Monthly Archives: June 2008

Re-imagining Success

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From W.David Phillips:

“At my last doctoral class with Len Sweet last week, he posed a question to us that went something like this: Provide for me the metaphors that will describe how we measure success in the church in the future. We are prone to measure success by how many and how much. And we determine who is a great leader by how many and how much.

So today, I want to share with you some of the metaphors we listed (and some I came up with afterwards), of things we can count as a measure of success. But I need to issue a warning. You will have to think about these and you may push back unless you realize the metaphor. So don’t react…Ponder…

1. The number of cigarette butts in the church parking lot.

2. The number of adoptions people in the church have made from local foster care.

3. The number of pictures on the church wall of unwed mothers holding their newborn babies in their arms for the first time.

4. The number of classes for special needs children and adults

5. The number of former convicted felons serving in the church

6. The number of phone calls from community leaders asking the church’s advice

7. The number of meetings that take place somewhere besides the church building

8. The number of organizations using the church building

9. The number of days the pastor doesn’t spend time in the church office but in the community

10. The number of emergency finance meetings that take place to reroute money to community ministry

11. The amount of dollars saved by the local schools because the church has painted the walls

12. The number of people serving in the community during the church’s normal worship hours

13. The number of non-religious-school professors worshiping with you

14. The number of people wearing good, free clothes that used to belong to members of the church

15. The number of times the church band has played family-friendly music in the local coffee shop

16. The number of people who have gotten better because of free health clinic you operate

17. The number of people in new jobs thanks to the free job training center you opened

18. The number of micro-loans given by members in your church

19. The number of churches your church planted in a 10 mile radius of your own church

Got any more?”

Why Young Adults Leave Church

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Mark Sayers

is blogging on some of the most common reasons 25-35 seems to be a dead spot for young adults when it comes to engaging in church life.

If you’re in youth ministry of any sort then this is a blog you need to be reading

Here are a few snippets:

From Your Faithclock is Ticking

In Logan’s Run death comes at thirty. For young adult Christians in the West it seems to be some time between 25 and 35 that the fire of faith begins to dim. For some it will remain a faint flicker, they will retain some kind of allegiance to Christianity; despite the fact their faith has lost any active component. Others will find their faith simply growing cold and then dying, the way a campfire goes out, it is burning when you go to sleep, but when you wake in the cold of the morning, it is nothing but cool ashes. You don’t know at what point it went out over night, but the fact remains it has gone out. Others will throw in the towel deliberately. It could be that a life of faith has simply become too hard, or perhaps faith did not deliver the kind of life that they thought that it was promising and thus it is abandoned.

and…

Everything changes when I ask my favourite question “How long do you guys plan on staying in this church?… Ten years?’ I normally get two responses. Response number one is “Are you joking. Ten years!!!” this is usually followed by laughter. The second response is simply blank stares, as if I have asked them a question in Swahili. My experience is that it does not matter what sort of church young adults are attending, be it large, small, emerging, contemporary, traditional; they are not planning on hanging around for any more than 3 years if you are lucky.

From Reason no.1 ‘Choice Anxiety’:

Christian young adults are stuck with a constant splinter in the mind, the never ending nagging feeling that they might have made the wrong decision. Maybe they have chosen the wrong church to attend, should they be at the hip contemporary mega-church down the road, or the small emerging church in the next suburb, or should they rejoin their friends and family at the traditional church that they grew up in? Did they even make right choice in following Christ? Maybe they should move Cities, States, Countries? Should they change partners, careers, lifestyles, ethics?

From Reason no.2 Post Christian Identity:

Christianity is perceived in the popular imagination as being intellectually ludicrous, our behaviour and opinions are seen as bigoted. Whilst obviously I disagree with these assessments, they are a daily reality for many young adults trying to live out their faith in the secular world.

From Reason no.3 The Pornification of Christian Resources:

I am constantly meeting young adults who are still passionate about their faith, but are no longer part of a faith community. When I ask them why, they tell me that there is no need. I ask them how they grow as Christians? They will tell me that they download podcasts from some of the worlds best preachers, they watch sermons on line from cutting edge churches, they read books from well known Christian writers, and attend all kinds of conferences and worship seminars. Some even regularly go on ‘mission trips’ to the third world. Many now choose to not go to their local church because every Sunday they can roll out of bed at midday and turn on Christian cable and watch services from the world’s most successful churches. They read blogs ( irony duly noted ) and frequent Christian chat rooms to connect with other believers. Like the Japanese Otaku they feel that technology has superseded their need for real world – real time relationships.

Better the Devil?…

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landy.jpg free deep the

When I bought my current Landcruiser just over 12 months ago I hadn’t noticed how gutless it was. I took it for a short test drive, but didn’t give it a real workout. It went well, was in amazing condition, with very low kms (180K for a 1985!), not a skerick of rust and was a huge bargain. So I jumped in… and it has been a very reliable and comfortable car. A real classic in fact!

It just isn’t fast, nor does it have any kind of punch. Sadly I no longer have the ability to spin my wheels at the lights. Even in gravel it just slowly cruises away…And when we go on holidays our chances of ever overtaking anyone are minimal.

The problem(s)

a) a 3F motor – translated ‘tractor’. Bulletproof, indestructible, but not pokey

b) automatic gear box – further slows it down

c) LPG – drops the power by another 10%. We would change to petrol if we thought we had a chance of overtaking someone while on holidays!

This is all kinda acceptable when most of your driving is around the local area, but imagine 25000kms around Oz towing some kind of campertrailer / caravan…

Ok, so the speed limit is 100km/hr, which would be us on a downhill run with everyone leaning forwards. But hit a few hills and the old girl will grind to a 60-70km crawl. Having towed a heavy boat for a few years I know its capacity.

So the question that arises again is whether we should upgrade. We have a very reliable old beast that I reckon would make the trip around Oz without batting an eyelid. It’d just be a tad slow.

Or we could get something a bit more powerful… (like a Daihatsu Charade…)

One of the reasons I like driving cheap cars is because – well – they are cheap! And secondly you don’t need to insure them comprehensively. A huge saving each year… So long as you get a good old beast and keep it looked after you can do ok.

But I’m wondering if we will go crazy travelling around Oz in the old funbus?…

Just thinking out loud…

Is it worth another 10K to get a car that might be more enjoyable to drive?… Or should we just suck it up and chug around the country in a tractor with side panels?

So what would you do?…

Grumpy

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I’ve been a bit grumpy lately.

I was coming home with fish and chips last night when I nearly ran over some kids who were riding their skateboards on the street in the dark. I pumped the horn loud and long to let them know I wasn’t impressed and they offered a few suggestions to me as to what I could do with myself. Instead of just driving on and leaving it at that I slowed, backed up and chased them. When I had them in my sights I hopped out and yelled ‘get off the road – you dickheads!’. I think they were a little scared as I heard a rather timid ‘yes’ in response.

I drove off snarling, but thought to myself ‘you’re the dickhead…’ It was a very unneccessary and inappropriate response but it flowed out almost effortlessly.

I think it was partly a result of other factors in my life at the moment.

Over the last few weeks we have been trying to help out some local families who find themselves in difficult life situations. As a result we currently have a little fella living with us whose mum is in hospital. I know that as a person who calls themself a follower of Jesus I should just be willing and happy to help out, but the last week or so I’ve been a bit over it and its made me irritable and edgy.

Without saying too much, it seems that when ‘mum’ has a meltdown, no one in the immediate family wants to know about it and a 7 year old is left with no-one to look after him. The government authorities will kick in with crisis care, but its not real good for a kid whose life is already disturbed. Usually ‘mum’ rings us first, and the last two times this has happened he has finished up in our home.

Its a long story and the personal details of it aren’t mine to put up here. But it has left me emotionally drained.

With a steady flow of visitors coming and going from our placey, as well as Danelle being a way for a week i was already feeling weary. So an added face around the house who we need to ‘train’ somewhat, adds to the load and last week I felt like my ability to cope and be a decent human being all but evaporated.

I have been reflecting on whether it is just that I am selfish and his presence inconveniences me, or if I am more tired than I had realised and in need of a more substantial rest. The last time he came I coped ok and while I do like to have space at home, I am also quite used to having people live with us. However most are adults and some are even moderately functional. 🙂

I have increasingly been feeling that the work we do here in Brighton with its very high relational component suits Danelle down to the ground, but is less so something that I am naturally gifted at. I think part of the reason I am doing a practical job is so that the task oriented side of me gets a decent work out and I find more satisfaction in life.

I reflected recently that it sometimes feels like Danelle and I have reversed roles and she is now the primary worker in our community with myself supporting her. Another role reversal is that now I feel like the one operating less from a position of strenght and giftedness, whereas in church life she was the one who had those feelings. Running a children’s ministry in a church of 400 people took a bit of organisational and leadership grunt and this was not Danelle’s forte, whereas it was one of my more natural skills. She was often tired by it and it wasn’t a good fit for her.

So at times I find the chaotic relational nature of our lives more wearying than I would care to admit (even though that is what I am doing now) and wonder if I am pushing myself too hard to be someone I am not.

Or…

And its a really important ‘or’…

Is this just part of the way in which God is shaping me into a more healthy and Christlike human being and the stresses I experience actually shape my character in a healthy way? If a significant portion of the christian life is ‘cross carrying’ and ‘self denial’, and we know that when we sign up – then should it surprise me if it actually happens?

My jury is out on that one at present, but I think the answer is likely ‘yes’…

Perhaps in the wash up of our lives I will bcome a more compassionate human being and that would be a good thing.

I just hope I can stop being such a grumpy bastard soon…

30 Minutes of Passion

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Box seats at the footy are always a nice thing, and today was a pretty cool afternoon.

Along with some others from the local community Danelle and I had a great time enjoying the view from one of the best vantage points in the stadium.

Great food and wine made up for another dismal Fremantle fade. After a great first quarter the ‘faders’ gradually slipped behind before recovering to be 1 point up at 3/4 time.

The last quarter was all Adelaide while Fremantle looked lost.

I tipped Freo on the ‘sooner or later’ basis (sooner or later they will win…) – looks like it will be later!four weddings and a funeral dvd