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t’s been a while since I have looked at myself in the mirror after a shower and thought ‘yep – doing OK for your age.’ In fact for the last few years I have lived wifh the knowledge that I have been overweight and out of shape and that I had chosen to be ‘semi-ok’ with it. I say ‘semi’ because I’d look in the mirror and think some disturbingly aggressive things. I was not happy with my effort – my laziness and my willingness to accept a dad-bod as the ‘new normal’. And I couldn’t blame it on covid, climate change or Trump… It was just that I had a crazy obsession with food. So rather than face the reality of what I saw in the mirror I would look away again and go chow down another banana pancake.

It wasn’t good and while I got fairly adept at disguising my bulging stomach, I was aware that it was a losing battle. My legs were getting ‘thicker’, my biceps saggy and I was losing count of my chins. My ‘pecs’ were also in need of their first trainer bra

I would literally look in the mirror and think ‘get a grip you fat ‘expletive‘! Stop kidding yourself that this is gonna work out for you and one day you will be ok with it all.’ Then I’d walk away and go back to another day of indulgence, all the while wrestling with myself – cursing my dumb choices and losing – and losing – and losing again.

You know what you feel like if you ‘lose’ regularly and predictably? It’s not a trick question. You feel like a loser. And I could wrap it all in a pretty theological bundle that told me God loves me anyway and I should be ‘kind to myself’ – but somehow that just felt like a cop-out.

For a period there I simply ate anything I felt like… whenever I felt like it… And – no – I wasn’t working or exercising it all away. During that time I would have the odd surf and do a few days of physical work, but mostly I was snout in the trough gorging on whatever I chose and slowly getting fatter and fatter. (Is it still OK to say ‘fat’ or is it on the banned language list?)

It was lamentable and embarrassing. I began to understand why people just give in and accept that this is how it’s gonna be.

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Pause there for a moment because I want to change tack. I bet you read that personal reflection right to the end and you’re probably still with me now wondering why I have paused mid-story.

I have paused because I want you to realise that we engage with stories. We like stories. We follow stories and we remember stories. Stories help us reflect on our own struggles. And no doubt some of you are reflecting on your own physical health – your own failures and wrestles.

Stories connect.

Have you ever heard a sermon that was ‘faithful to the text’, thorough and clear but boring as hell? The speaker had worked out the point of the text, distilled into several points and simply walked you thru the passage with no reference to real life.

Exegeting a passage, quoting commentators and explaining Greek grammar has its place, but generally speaking it is utterly un-memorable and liable to have a large slice of the crowd wander off mentally unless it is accompanied by some story telling – and not the stuff you find in ‘apprentice pastor’ illustration books.

I have a belief that I can learn from anyone – no matter how dreadful their communication style and method. But I remember one morning in a country church where I actually found myself surfing Facebook after around 5 minutes. I literally couldn’t bear it any more, and I was distracting myself. I felt for the man speaking, as this clearly was not one of his gifts.

This post is not for people wrestling with their weight issues. (although I will finish the story later for those who care to read on) It is for pastors and teachers in various spaces and it is a plea…

Please be interesting… Please be engaging… Please help us to understand how scripture connects with life. And do it by telling stories. Have you ever noticed how a crowd of people change when the presenter says ‘lemme tell you a story…’ And if it’s a personal, humorous and even self disparaging story, then even better.

So (if you’re still reading) please please please if you’re going to communicate something as important as the Christian faith then spend the time to connect stories to truth so that people actually listen and absorb. I remember when I was 18 and doing volunteer work for YouthFor Christ. We were taught that it was a sin to bore a kid with the gospel and we were trained in a way that took that to heart. No boring talks – ever… It is a sin…

Jesus told stories – all the time… Mark says ‘He never taught anything without using a story.’ (Mark 4:34) Surely that is enough to give us a steer!

And yet so much Christian communication still feels like a laboured walk thru a mash of theology and history text books as they relate to the Bible.

If you’re a preacher and see yourself in this post then get some help – a coach who can help you see your own life as fertile ground for stories. It may not come naturally at first, but practice observing and reflecting and actually telling stories. Then watch the difference in an audience when you begin to tell a story.

Got it?

Tell more stories because people tend to absorb truth thru story.

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Back to my unfinished story. (Did you skip the middle section of this post?)

In November we took off on holidays for two weeks with my old mate Stu and his wife Carolyn. What struck me was that my friend who had never had a lean build for all of his adult life was now in very trim shape. He had somehow shed the bulk that he had carried for so long and he looked great.

It was actually an inspiration – the kind of inspiring that I needed to kick-start me beyond another new years resolution or mere good intention. And alongside the inspiration (if Stu can do it then surely I can too…) was the need to a) admit that I ws failing b) seek some help to learn about diet and just how many kj I was pumping into my body each day c) Start again

Anyone know what it’s like when you have ‘tried’ and failed many times? Yeah- it’s hard to believe that this time will actually be the one that sticks.

I heard Stu say ‘Hamo – you just can’t outrun a bad diet.’ And that resonated as what my plan had always been. Eat big – exercise bigger and the equation will balance. Not any more… In reality it probably hasn’t worked for 20 years or so. I was probably eating so much that I need to run a daily half marathon just to stay in shape.

When it’s November 28th and you’re looking down the barrel of a trip to Bali (cheap Asian food!!! yeah!!), Christmas and new year parties then it is tempting to say let’s start Jan 2… Let’s be reasonable… But truth be told there will always be something to hold you in the pattern you are in.

So I decided to try again starting Nov28 – cynical about my potential success – aware that I have failed so many times here, but knowing I just had to focus.

Three months later after daily exercise and just getting to grips with the actual kilojoule content of the food I have been eating I have managed to get back to a much healthier place. This week I finally managed to get a ‘7’ in front of my weight down from 91 kg. And yes it’s noticeable in how I feel in myself and about myself. But what really caught me off guard was how it impacted my surfing. I had been feeling old and kooky for a while now, struggling to paddle in, struggling to pop up, struggling to take the drop… And even when I did I felt like I was losing my balance easily. I think that extra 12kg was doing more damage than I ever knew. The two surfs I had this week both came easy and I noticed the difference significantly.

So it’s nice to be healthy again, but I ‘feel’ about food like an alcoholic would about grog. It would be so easy to go on a month long bender and undo it all. It is a temptation that is always there and I doubt I will ever beat it completely. But I hope that having done some learning and having put in the hours to get fit, maybe this will be the final battle of this magnitude.

That may not sound super-optimistic – but I feel like I know myself well enough to be aware that I lie to myself and justify things at times, when in reality I just need to call it and stop trying to kid myself.

So this is not a celebratory cheer. (I may cheer in 5 years time so hold all applause until then.) Rather its a recognition of a small beginning that I hope will be the new pattern for life from here on.

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So there’s a story and if I were telling it to a crowd I would not shy away from the rawness of it and the reality of what was in effect a food addiction – the Bible calls it gluttony.

In terms of how it would fit in a bit of biblical teaching? There are so many angles. Here are a few:

– 1 Cor – The body is a temple – treat it as such

– Hebrews 12 – throwing off the sin that so easily entangles. (Gluttony is a sin – just a socially acceptable one)

– James 1:23 speaks of the man who hears the word but doesn’t do what it says is like a man who looks in a mirror and then goes away and forgets what he looks like. The point he makes is that you have missed the point of what the mirror is for.

– A message about fasting. While on holidays I said to Stu ‘I hate fasting. I get hungry and h-angry!’ Said in jest – but true. I fasted one day for 3 whole weeks before quitting… I couldn’t get the point of it. I just dreaded the day arriving. Then one day as I was doing some praying and reflecting I sensed God saying, ‘I would like you to hunger for me like you currently do for food.’ That connected. So I began fasting again, this time with a greater sense of purpose beyond simple self denial. Its a learning curve for me.

I could go on, but you get the point. And hopefully my story might help it stick.

If you’re gonna talk to crowds of people and actually hold their attention, as well as communicate truth to them then you must tell stories.

And yes – stories have the danger of being narcissistic and self indulgent, so make sure you check your heart as to whether the story is more about you than about what God wants to say. While boredom is horrible so is listening to someone rattle on about themself with only a wafer thin connection to the actual point.