Or as the Americans like to say ‘poo-berty’, happens to everyone sooner or later and it can be a fairly intense and crazy time. All sorts of chaos takes place in this period of life.

The same kind of phenomena happens in faith. If we are going to mature, we almost inevitably have to experience a ‘puberty’ of sorts – a time of reframing and recalibrating what it means to be a person of faith. It can actually be a really distressing and disturbing time, especially if you don’t see it coming. And moreso if you don’t have a church community that can help you.

A number of people have written about the various stages of faith. James Fowler speaks of 6 stages with stage 4 being the ‘critic’, the one who no longer accepts old understandings but must find a way to shift from a childlike faith to an adult expression (stage 4 = puberty). Kiwi Alan Jamieson wrote his book ‘An Unchurched Faith’ based on Fowler’s research and observed that in Evangelical / Pentecostal churches questioning and doubting is not well received. He tracked the journeys of many ‘stage 4’ people and observed that they seemed to ‘bounce’ out of churches during this time. It’s been the case that our communities can sometimes struggle to deal with the ‘difficult’ people who ask ‘inappropriate’ questions, refuse to accept the party line answers and who then disturb the equilibrium. I know of people who have been told to ‘stop questioning and just believe’. If only it worked like that…

Sadly, some do stop questioning and try to ‘just believe’, but sooner or later all of that unprocessed doubt, questioning and ruminating comes out in one way or another. When faith is refused access to this stage it becomes brittle and fractures easily. I think of a good bloke I studied with who came to Bible college full of conviction and certainty, but whose world rocked as he had to grapple with the inevitable questions that get raised in higher education. As far as I know his faith shattered and never did re-form. Tragic – not that Bible colleges raise tough issues – but that middle aged men can enter with a faith so naïve and infantile.

Recently I was listening to Brian McClaren speaking on the Bible For Normal People podcast (not a podcast for ‘simplistic faith’ people) about his new book ‘Faith After Doubt’ where he offers a 4 stage framing of how faith develops:

1. Simplicity – we believe what we are told. We accept like children and trust those who teach us. It’s what our own kids do for a period. Kids accept that Jesus walked on water… As they mature they wonder about whether that is really a thing. So they should…
2. Complexity – This stage sets in as doubts emerge, prayers go unanswered, God feels distant, the Bible doesn’t make sense and maybe Christian friends let us down. Many questions come and we leave behind ‘simple belief’. We become aware of the incongruities.
3. Perplexity  – We feel overwhelmed with doubt at times. We wonder if the whole thing is a hoax. I remember a friend describing this as like driving a car around a bend on a gravel road at 100kph. You feel like you have no control and you don’t know where it’s going to end. Being perplexed can be really really disturbing. It’s in this stage where we must grapple with the difficult questions and seek resolution – or maybe in this stage it’s where we walk away from faith because we just can’t resolve the tensions and incongruities.
4. Harmony – I’m not sure if this is the best word, but it is McClaren’s word for the place we arrive at when we have been able to make peace with our doubts, cynicism and questions. In this phase we can affirm ‘God is good’, even if we can’t understand why the world is so messy. We can affirm the Bible as reliable and trustworthy, even if we are aware of the realities of different interpretations and understandings. All of the difficult and incomprehensible questions may still be there, but they no longer disorient us like they once did.

But you don’t get to harmony from simplicity. You have to go thru the process and allow yourself to grapple with the questions. I know McClaren’s theology has taken a hammering lately (and I actually can’t comment on that because I haven’t read the book), but I do think he does us a favour with these 4 easily recognised stages.

As churches we need to create space for the questioners, cynics and the doubters. Rather than fearing their questions, invite them and create a space where we can ponder together, struggle together, sometimes find answers and sometimes say ‘this is too difficult to figure out’. What we can’t be is afraid of the questions because this suggests we have something to hide. There is an element of mystery in faith that we must invite people into if they are to mature. Of course we have to have done the journey ourselves to be able to guide another thru it.

So – if you feel like you are in a spiritual crazy zone – questions, doubts then don’t panic. Seriously – it’s a good thing. You are really just maturing – finding a resilient and robust faith rather than pushing under the rug a faith you know is fragile and easily shattered. And if you feel disillusioned then remember that is a good thing. Being ‘dis-illusioned’ means that your illusions have been removed and you are seeing truly. This is the path to spiritual maturity.